connecticut

This week was tough! I'm feeling pretty good right now so I don't want to describe it too much and get sucked back into it, but gosh, the last few days have way less than ideal. My beautiful week that I had planned out went about 50% well. I'm a frustrated person as of late. My mind is going a hundred miles an hour. I'm thinking way too hard about way too many things. And its making me crazy!

There is a talk Elder Haworth has on a CD called the Mortal Christ. Its by Jack R. Christiansen. I believe. Read or listen to this talk - its top notch. Seriously. I think I mentioned a little part of it last week or the week before. Some wonderful insights into a bunch of things.

What else... there are some crazy people in the world. Sometimes I walk down the street in New Haven or see people walking around here and just think to myself, count your blessings. The worst my life has ever been can't even compare to what some people live in every single day. Gosh we are blessed. I think about these people and how my purpose right now is to bring them the gospel. My faith is weak right now with many of them. I feel like I don't believe so many of them would listen to the gospel or accept it. Its frustrating to me. Of course they aren't going to accept it if I don't even offer it to them. I know it can help people, everyone, but it seems like I lack the faith that people out there are actually willing to make the changes in their lives. The spirit is what converts people, and maybe they would make the changes if they really felt the spirit. But I don't feel like people are even open to try feeling the spirit. I do my best to explain the importance of the Book of Mormon and what it can do for them and what it means. But as soon as we leave, people go back to the daily grind and forget all about. Good thing Zone Conference is this week, maybe that will recharge my batteries a little bit.

I shouldn't write all this stuff! Life is good. Everything is perfect! I love being a missionary woo hoo! No problems at all, I love people!

So many people say that you get to a point and things start falling into place. You get through that first 3 months and you figure things out. 6 months and you’re all set. I have the basics figured out. I know what to do. I know how to go about it. But I feel like there is so much more that I am still just not dialing in on. One more thing that frustrates me.

Listen to me. I am sorry. This is probably the worst email I've sent home yet. I think I've had enough guys. My mind is unfocused. I'm all over the place. Can you tell?

But I love ya’ll so much and am so grateful for all of you. So so much.

Elder Kunzzzzzzz

Also the humidity is killer. Like bad killer.