Today I am scatterbrained but happy

Ah man, I miss all ya all so much! I'm in a much nicer place mentally than last week, so hopefully this will sound a little more optimistic and happy and all. I think way, way too much sometimes. Way too hard. Gotta SIMPLIFY! Easier said than done sometimes.

Zone conference. Zone conference was fantastic! Oh my it was so great. President Pehrson is such a radical dude! Such a spiritual powerhouse. I can only imagine the power that is given to these mission presidents. The gift of discernment, the gift of the spirit... What a blessing it is to be exposed to such a person on such a regular basis. We're supposed to write a letter to president every week and my last two have been pretty long and all over the place. Kinda like my mind! But I'm getting much better. Anyway, he wrote me a little letter back! It was so kind and thoughtful of him. Maybe he does it to many Elders, but it meant a lot to me. He gave me some counsel for my frustrations, and encouragement and all. It was cool. Very nice to receive.

The Gospel of Jesus Christ is so wonderful! I come across so many intellectual things that support what we do and the existence and plan of God. Logic and reason based things. Those are fun. I enjoy hearing them. Of course. It helps strengthen my testimony. But its such a wonderful thing to have those things in your head when you really feel the spirit confirm the truth. I wish there was a more effective way to tell everyone about this. Connecticut is an interesting place. The work is best if done through the members. Most of our progressing investigators, those who have the most potential for baptism, come from members in some way or another.

Its a joy to learn all the things that I do. To feel my testimony grow. To have all these experiences, even though so many of them make me insane sometimes! Being a missionary is pretty awesome in general though. Lately I've been considering how my time in Madison is probably right about at its end though, and it is such a bummer to think about leaving some of these people. There are some fantastic members here. Some wonderful families and amazing people. Great examples that I'm so thankful to have been exposed to. To see what things are important to me and that I want for myself one day.

And soon I'll have to say goodbye. Many of them I will never see again in my whole life! Sad huh! Its such an interesting way of life as a missionary. I develop these great relationships with people, and then I say goodbye. It makes me sad. Many of these people I would like to stay in touch with. But many I just know it won't actually happen. But on the other hand, I am a missionary. People see me as a missionary. We come and we go. Some of us are better than others. Me going just means another one is coming. Soon Elder Kunz will just be a name and a memory. Hopefully a positive one, but the whole system of it still bums me out a little. But again on the other hand, leaving just means that I'll get to go meet a bunch more people.

Geeze guys, I feel like I have written about nothing today. I have all these wonderful feeling inside me about some of the things I've experienced lately and how wonderful much of it has been, but its just not coming out.Its so important. The gospel. I love it. I absolutely love it, and again, wish there was a more effective way to tell people about it. Member missionary work, done well, is that way. Its really, really hard for many of us, but us knocking on people's doors seem to get us nowhere 95% of the times. And all these people are missing out! The happiest person you know could be even happier! To have the same purpose that we know! Ah, its so wonderful.

I really can't even come close to getting out what I wanted to today. Its just not happening so I think I'll not bother too much anymore especially since I'm out of time.

Love you! So much!